Note - This is the continuation of a vanity project. A novel written in parts, with minimal editing or fuss. If I like the end result I may gather up all the parts and rewrite them into something better. This is a learning process. I’m a decent writer but a total amateur when it comes to putting a good story together.
This has been a struggle for me, but with each chapter I think I’m working out how to write a good tale. Join me and lets see where it ends up.
You can find parts 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5 here.
Pain, I came to feel, might well prove to be the sole proof of the persistence of consciousness within the flesh, the sole physical expression of consciousness. - Yukio Mishima.
Jonathan’s old morning routine involved flopping out of bed, chucking something on, often getting stoned, drinking his energy drinks, then much later eating whatever was left over from his previous nights orders. He sat there in a state of near-shock as Fred gave him (practically upon waking) some bread caked in butter, and a few helpings of a sort of stew. It was absolutely wonderful, and fulfilled Jon in a way he’d never really felt. There was something about it though that brought back childhood memories, something he couldn’t put his finger on.
Fred took him outside and showed him around. The farm was more extensive than it had first appeared, but mostly consisted of just a few sandy mostly barren fields. These included a whole heap of goats and other animals, including a cow. Jonathan had never seen these before, so spent a lot of time admiring the creatures. Jon noticed as they walked around that there were a few more of those strange circular doors on the ground, many covered with sand so just the central handle peeked out. As requested he didn’t bring them up with Fred at all. He diverted this curiosity by asking Fred: “You do all this alone?”
Fred replied smiling: “Of course boy, though it wasn’t always this way, a story I’ll tell you about another time, now look at this”
Fred took Jonathan to the edge of one of the fields. Here Jon could see a few large wooden stakes in the ground. Spaced maybe 20-30 paces apart. On the floor was a large bundle of what looked like metal wire. Even Jon in his ignorance assumed this was some sort of fence being built. All around them the horizon was largely barren, with a few greenish hills in the distance. What impressed Jonathan about this place most of all was the sky. It just seemed so big, so immersive, so present. It had never felt like this in Condonia. Today it was a crystal sort of blue, not a single cloud in sight.
”This will be your main job for now, I want you to finish this fence”
”HOW!?” Jonathan replied in confusion.
”Just watch me” grumbled Fred, obviously amused but trying to sound stern.
Jon watched as Fred grabbed a stake and a large two-handed hammer from a nearby small hand-cart. He walked over to the three already in and revealed to Jon how the rest of the pen had been mapped out on the ground with sticks and stones. He went to the first marking and positioned the stake. The massive hammer looked so easy for him to swing. Within 4-5 taps it was embedded and he smiled in satisfaction. It all looked relatively simple.
”We’ll join up the wire later, for now I want you to just go around and bang in these for me, think you can do that? Just follow the markings”
”Of course!” said Jon with more enthusiasm than he felt. He wasn’t sure why he even gave that sort of response. He felt he wanted to impress Fred.
At this point Fred left him alone, and Jon began. The work was simple enough at first, he got the stake in the ground easy enough. The first hit was a lot more difficult than he expected, the second was even harder. By the fifth hit Jon really broke through the ground (which seemed far firmer than it had appeared when Fred did it!) but by now he was covered in sweat, struggling to lift his arms for another swing. He sat down for a second and gathered his bearings. In the distance he heard Fred’s Landcruiser, and not wanting to be caught slacking he jumped up and put everything he had into another few hits. Ten hits later and the job was done. Jonathan grabbed the cart, and moved on.
Hours later Jonathan had managed another four, and was surprised to see Fred show up in his cruiser again. He handed Jonathan a large jug of water and some hard cheese. “Eat and drink boy, you’ll need it”
Jon sheepishly admitted he’d only got five done, but Fred seemed pleased. “That’s fine, you’ll get there, I want you to get another 10 done today though”
Jon pretended this news didn’t horrify him, but as Fred left he slugged on, feeling it better to push rather than to stop and risk being unable to move. The next five actually seemed easier than the first lot, but then things began to feel impossible.
The sun was actually setting by the time Jonathan was done, he staggered his way back towards the cabin. He entered and went to the temporary bed on the couch, intending to simply take off his boots and rest…..
”Wake up!”
Jonathan woke to Fred stood over him, a smirk on his face and a twinkle in his eyes. “Bet you’ve never experienced a day like that huh fatty?”
Jon could smell more of that wonderful stew, and his stomach brought him to full awareness within minutes. Fred outlined to him the plan for the morrow, finishing the damn fence, and Jon became filled with a profound sense of dread.
Jon ate quickly and excused himself, keen to get back to sleep as soon as possible. As he lay down shortly after, he somehow actually caught himself smiling. The sweat rash between his rolls stung, his muscles ached, his back twinged, but he felt like he had actually achieving something, done something. A strange sense of satisfaction overtook him as he slept.
Jonathan finished the fence, and moved on to other jobs. The lifestyle became routine for him and Fred, and though they continued to talked little, they shared a sort of camaraderie that Jon had never known. Jonathan washed himself off in the shower while reflecting on how long he’d been here with Fred, a lifestyle he’d already begun to consider home. He’d seen 3 or maybe even 4 full moons since his arrival, so it must have been a few months at least. As he jumped out the shower Jon avoided the mirror (as had become his custom since that first night) but saw something shocking out of the corner of his eye. For a split-second he was sure a stranger was in the room with him, then in shock he realized it was himself. He stood staring for what felt like hours, admiring his musculature, realizing what his face looked like under the fat. He was looking incredibly fit and strong. Sure, he’d felt the changes in his body over these months, but he simply hadn’t thought about it. He’d conditioned himself over years to ignore the state of his body, all he’d accepted was his increasing strength and the absence of sweaty rashes.
Jonathan was slim, fit, and (at least to his own eyes) quite handsome! His aquiline nose and strong jaw, high cheekbones. There was a sort of nobility to his features, especially with his piercing blue eyes and shock of red-blonde hair. He didn’t know he looked like this, he hadn’t seen himself as anything but gross. As a piggy. He’d tied his hair back and forgot about it months ago, but realized now it was really quite long. In the light it seemed to shine, almost like gold. He smiled. He experienced a sense of real awe.
Fred walked in
”Oooh lala, like what ye see do ya? HAHAHAH” he mocked good naturedly.
Jonathan laughed, saying “I can’t believe its me! I just cannot believe this!”
They sat in the lounge eating their finest meal yet, some goat cooked beautifully by Jon himself, Fred had been teaching him to cook. Jonathan was absent-mindedly looking around the room when he noticed something.
”That book!? Where did you get that!? Is it yours!?”
Jon had noticed the book laying on the shelf in the corner. He realized it was the exact same book that had got him removed from Condonia. He grabbed it and turned to Fred.
Fred smiled and nodded “Wondered when you would notice that. You mentioned it months ago when you told me your tale, but I thought it best to sort out your fucking body before we dealt with anything else. Know what? We are gonna have a day off tomorrow and really get to know each other properly”